Ruminations

i've moved to tumblr

2011-12-02T08:42:00.000-08:00

Yups: go there instead!

i also occasionally post to my coding blog and a few links of fun live music :)

Does anyone really read this anyway?

2010-06-30T20:10:00.000-07:00

Not sure who reads this, but i've secretly been posting to tumblr. i feel a little guilty, but not enough i guess.

i will probably maintain these side by side for a while and we'll see who emerges, but i'm thinking Tumblr will become my blog of choice.

Summer Reading List

2010-06-20T13:05:00.001-07:00

Inspired by my Internet pal petiteartichoke's summer reading list i've compiled my own little list for the summer.

i'm not sure why i've never compiled my own summer list. i am a slow reader, but that sounds more like an excuse than a valid reason. Fortunately, i've already finished one and it's not even summer yet.

The List:

Catch-22 - Read
Divine Conspiracy
Ender's Game
The Sirens of Titan
Breaking Down Walls
When We Were Giants
Into Thin Air
I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings

Stephen Colbert uses Bing

2010-06-10T07:33:00.001-07:00

Nice. Great pun at the end. i'm a fan.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/06/08/stephen-colbert-bing-rais_n_605096.html

2010-05-23T16:14:00.000-07:00

...and who had worked so effectively to insulate him against the myriad social vicissitudes involved in his official duty to live on closest terms of familiarity with more than nine hundred unfamiliar officers and enlisted men who thought him an odd duck.

of the Chaplain, Catch-22

Are there any that dont sparkle?

2010-05-17T11:45:00.000-07:00

i actually do juggle. i know it's hard to believe, but my cute little username actually does have some sort of meaning behind it. And the meaning is quite literal: i do love to juggle. That doesnt mean i'm good, but i have been known to juggle things that are on fire...

Recently, RIT hosted a juggling convention and i was thinking about picking up some gear. Mainly, i wanted juggling balls that didnt bounce everywhere when i dropped them (which happens a whole lot).

i went to a vendor and saw a great selection of colors for beanbag-type juggling balls. The issue: they all sparkled. Come on, i know you wonder what's different about me because i love to juggle, but sparkly juggling balls?

i asked the lady, "Do you have any juggling balls that dont sparkle?"

Her response?

That's such an odd request. I haven't heard that one before.

Really?

2010-04-22T08:57:00.000-07:00

Children have a lesson adults should learn, to not be ashamed of failing, but to get up and try again. Most of us adults are so afraid, so cautious, so 'safe,' and therefore so shrinking and rigid and afraid that it is why so many humans fail. Most middle aged adults have resigned themselves to failure.

Malcolm X

The True Criterion of Leadership is Spiritual

2010-04-22T08:55:00.000-07:00

Mankind's history has proved from one era to another that the true criterion of leadership is spiritual. Men are attracted by spirit. By power, men are forced. Love is engendered by spirit. By power, anxieties are created.

Malcolm X

multitudes of theories, facts, and techniques

2010-04-11T14:29:00.000-07:00

The multitudes of theories, facts, and techniques that have emerged in recent centuries have not the least logical bearing upon the ultimate issues of existence and life. In this respect they only serve to distract and confuse a people already harassed witless by their slogans, scientific advances, "labor-saving" devices, and a blizzard of promises about when and how "happiness" is going to be achieved. Vague references to "particles and progress" do not provide a coherent picture of life.

Dallas Willard, The Divine Conspiracy

2010-03-09T19:19:00.000-08:00

...and James sloughed a slew of overdue library books, having yet again bit off more than he could chew.

Everyone has their own spin

2010-03-09T18:23:00.000-08:00

i've visited a sweet black church the past two weeks on Sunday morning. As part of their worship they recite the Apostle's Creed.

It's a pretty normal thing to say in a church. It's old, it's tested and approved, and lots of Christians can agree over it (not all probably, but we dont talk about them).

But at this church they changed a small thing that ends up revealing their hand.

It's not "catholic" (lower-case 'c' of course) but "Christian" church.

It screams, "we are not Catholic!"

Everyone has their spin i guess, throwing their little twist of interpretation into the mix. Oh, and the "Virgin Mary" was written "virgin Mary". The devil's in the details. And i'm sure i missed some other nuances in there...

Oh decision making

2010-01-15T07:45:00.000-08:00

i'm a terrible decision maker. In fact, it's caused a lot of personal trouble over the last 3 years. Boo on that garbage. As a result, my life hasnt gone the way i would've expected, but that's part of the fun isnt it? As least that's what i tell myself when i cant sleep.

i thought of this on my continuing journey of reading through 37signals Getting Real. The article "Done!" reminded me of the beauty of making a decision and then getting something accomplished.

My usual response to making a decision is: "i wont decide now, i'll do it later". i like that because it's easy to say and easier to do - because i dont have to do anything.

When i worked with Campus Crusade under the illustrious Nate Miller i was shocked when he said during a meeting. "Well, we've talked through this, who's going to do it and when should we expect it done by?" (at least that's what i heard)

i was completely caught off guard. Did we officially put this to a vote and pass on it? Shouldnt we wait another month to make sure we absolutely have to do this and it's a sure-fire bet?

No.

And surprise surprise, we got things done!

At the time i thought we should know we were completely right before making a move, but at the core i was just being lazy.

Here's to making decisions and realizing they dont trap me, but free me. And who says you cant revisit, or deem it a mistake?

Besides, i dont think Good isnt worth sacrificing for Perfection.

More cds and listening to them!

2009-11-15T14:55:00.000-08:00

And now for something completely different...

or not.

So i've been listening to my cds, one a day - more or less - all week and it's been a blast.

Throughout the day i've played through Jenny Lewis's album off and on while playing video games or goofing around the house. i havent really listened to the album since the first time i was going through it for my little project. The idea of revisiting something i bought that i havent given much thought to since is rare for me, mostly because in the past buying things has been rare to me. My new-found wealth is baffling to me, i still havent grown accustomed to it, well - i've grown accustomed to it, just not in every aspect of my life.

Either way. i ran into a snag - my sister has my Modest Mouse cd. So i'm putting that on hold until i can find it.

So the list for past listens looks like:
-Mon: Bob Dylan's Highway 61
-Tues: Miles Davis's Kind of Blue
-Wed: (skipped! :0 )
-Thurs: Mae's Singularity and Animal Collective
-Fri: The Beatles Love with a sister and friend over for dinner
-Sat: (skipped! :0 )
-Sun: Jenny Lewis's Acid Tongue

So in the future (i need my Bon Iver cd from a friend too!)
-Mon: Fiction Family and Andrew Bird's Noble Beast (! - awesome)
-Tues: Derek Truck's Already Free
-Wed: Graceland
-Thurs: Brett Dennen's Hope for the Hopeless
-Fri: Jimi's Electric Ladyland (Have you ever been? ...)
-Sat: Flaming Lips - Yoshimi!

i've been keeping track of NPR's best music of the decade head over the npr.org's music side if you want in. They have some great running commentary and i'm excited to see what they'll list as the best music of the decade.

Also there's a great paste blog with their pick for the top 50 albums of the decade and you can stream all of them!

Kind of Blue

2009-11-10T18:26:00.001-08:00

Poetic.

i was feeling Kind of Blue while getting off work today.

Miles Davis's (?) Kind of Blue never was my favorite album of his. i tend to prefer Sketches of Spain or Miles Ahead and sometimes Porgy and Bess, as well as that one album my dad has of him playing with Dizzy Gillespie and Charlie Parker. i like the orchestral sound of the Gil Evans albums and the strong melodies.

All that said, i'm just realizing how much i connect with what Miles was tryinng to do with this album, simplify simplify simplify. It sounds like he moved to modal songs for this album to rebel against the complexity in jazz at the time. im guessing Bebop was in full swing at this period. That would make a lot of sense.

Lately i've been thinking about what i call the Postmodern Dilemma of too much choice. and i'm drawing heavily from others on that statement. i've heard it best described in a podcast put out by RadioLab called "Choice." Also, i've drawn a bunch of inspiration lately from 37signals. Their software and ideas raise simplicity up as a high principle in order to have their software do important tasks well and easily. They go so far as to say "less is less" in rebellion to the idea that less should serve "more."

There is too much choice available (or is there?), but at the same time, i like having all these choices. i think it just forces grappling with adulthood a little more. For someone like me who tries to have a million concurrent hobbies and is very interested in the world around me it's easy to get caught up.

i'm starting to see how Miles constructed the songs in Kind of Blue to take away a bunch of complex chord changes to allow for a beautiful melody to emerge.

Like a Rolling Stone

2009-11-09T17:47:00.000-08:00

For those of you in the know. i've been buying myself a cd every week for the past year. It was born out of a rough last year and my love for music. It's been a blast spending dolla$ on music, rejuvenating involving friends in it, and a lot of work assembling tracks, lists, letters, and envelopes.

It's been worth it.

So to celebrate i'm listening to each of the albums with the last 52 days of the year in celebration. And i'd like to extend an invitation to join. i'm just writing this now, so you'll probably miss out on Bob Dylan's Like a Rolling Stone.

So please join in! You can celebrate with me however you'd like... listen to the 2/3 songs i selected from the album on the same day and send me a tweet/facebook message/email/letter/phone call. Or even if you're ambitious, pick an album you like and want to join with me in listening wherever you are. Bonus points if you join me in person!

So...

Like a complete unknown, like a rolling stone

here i go into the close of the year!

ps i'll try to post more of a schedule! and hopefully i've counted right, so that this is actually the start of the last 52 days of the year.

for now:
-Mon - Like a Rolling Stone - Bob Dylan
-Tues - Kind of Blue - Miles Davis
-Wed - Good News for People Who Love Bad News - Modest Mouse
-Thurs - Singularity - Mae
-Fri - Merriweather Post Pavilion - Animal Collective

Also

2009-10-28T15:39:00.001-07:00

At the Andrew Bird concert the other night i was stopped by the guy at the door:

Open your purse.

Speechless.

Dude, it's my man-bag.

The worst thing that can ever be said about anyone

2009-10-28T15:19:00.000-07:00

i'm currently reading through a book with a small group of people on emotionally healthy spirituality. In fact, that's what the book is called Emotionally Healthy Spirituality.

At one point the author discusses Joe DiMaggio. i dont know much about his life, but reading what the author had to say got me so sad:

Who knows what negative core beliefs Joe might have carried within himself. I doubt Joe DiMaggio himself knew. However, one thing is sure, his life was both a lie and a tragedy.

That's terrible. i'm still trying to figure out where it was on NPR that i heard about the importance of tragedy in art and how society needs it, but it's no fun seeing someone's life involve a real fall that they dont ever climb up from.

wedding conversation

2009-09-30T18:42:00.000-07:00

(Me and two bridesmaids i didnt know)

Erin: I'm sick of all this theological talk.

Me: Let's tell corny jokes.

Rhonda: or lets just say stuff that relates to corn...

Me: i dont know about this.

Rhonda: Quit talking my ears off.

James: There is not one kernel of truth to what you're saying.

Rhonda: i was worried, for a second there i thought you were trying to butter me up.

James: Don't get salty with me.

Clam Juice!

2009-09-05T19:07:00.001-07:00

Clam Juice!
Originally uploaded by jugglingnutcase.

So i keep watch on my flickr stats. Mostly because i wonder if anyone actually looks at them, so every once in a while i'll check to see what gets looked at and guess what others seem to think is worth looking at...

Well, apparently the other day it was my clam juice photo. it got a bunch of hits, and i have no idea why. i took this photo forever ago, and i'll be the first to admit that it's not all that special.

clam juice!

Tires

2009-09-01T21:42:00.000-07:00

Today was quite an adventure!

i took my car in to get inspected and after dropping it off, took off in my bike to go to work. Halfway to work i blew out my rear tire. Fortunately, on Sunday i bought a spare because i knew if i started biking regularly to work i would need one. So i set to work on pulling out the old tube (to be patched later), putting in the new one, and pumping it up and midway through pumping up the new tube i split the valve right in half! i'm not sure if my little hand-pump couldnt handle my muscular physique or if i was just doing things wrong! Well, now that i'm back to doing software stuff, i have to think it was operator error.

Either way, i had to walk the remaining mile and a half - bike in tow - to work.

Pretty normal stuff right?

The other day i was listening to NPR on my way home and they had some sort of psychologist on talking about kids and lying. He said that lying shows that a child is being creative and isn't just a failure of upbringing, but he also said that a way to help instill morality in a child is to tell them (maybe right before they might want to lie) something to the effect of:

You know. It makes me really happy when you tell the truth.

And that was a pretty good thought for me to chew on. The reason to say this is because people pick up that good news is better than bad news and if you can get away with it, give out good news.

So the thought i came up with is, "Am i happier with reality than fantasy?"

And that especially gnawed at me when i was walking my bike down a busy street having my bike pedals clip the side of my leg.

And yes, i ended up having a great day! i had breakfast at the local diner and did the crossword. i biked home on a patched up spare that held perfectly. i got a new spare tire because the bike shop was nice enough to let me in 10 minutes after they closed, and i got to take pictures of two fawns hanging out in downtown Rochester. They let me get about 10 feet away from them!

So, am i choosing to be happier with reality?

On finding an emotional vocabulary

2009-08-03T19:11:00.000-07:00

My friend texted me the other day saying that i left my diary at his house after visiting. i was certain i did not (and by the way it's a journal, thank you very much). Then he mentioned that he was joking and said my letter was super emotional.

Backstory: i went through a rough patch earlier in the year, since i was living back with my parents, unemployed due to leaving this great work community, and generally stuck in life. So my solution was to buy myself things! Music specifically, and so i started getting a cd a week to generate some of the hope that had been stolen away. Then i felt like i should share it and use it to connect with friends over. From there, i started sending out mix cds accompanied by a letter sharing what was going on in my life. And yes, due to my sensitive disposition, they have been somewhat thick emotionally.

That little interchange brought out some thoughts. i'm wondering if there's a mature and substantial emotional vocabulary between me and my friends. Do we know how to communicate this and is the language available for it? And, also, is there space for emotional discussions in general society? i'm not sure that emotional vulnerability is a value.

And yes, yes, i can point to my disposition as evidence that it's just me that thinks something is out of whack, but is it possible that this really is an issue?

Maybe it's time to normalize this. Look out for awkward questions...

My introduction to New Orleans

2009-07-06T10:03:00.001-07:00

Someone asked me for a story the other day and i thought, "How fun!" so here's a story that i want to tell!

About 2 years ago i moved to New Orleans to do some relief work with a team for a year. As an introduction to the city my roommate took us to the Quarter to show us all the cool spots that you dont see unless you actually live there. We were obviously too cool to do touristy things there.

As soon as we got down to Frenchman Street we noticed that traffic was blocked off and there were no signs of why... until a man ran by in a red dress. Then a few minutes later, three more men ran by in red dresses. And then after that there was a flood of people running down the street, all in red dresses! Men and women alike! My friends and i had to get out and investigate and when we asked someone what was going on he responded, "It's August and we're running in red dresses and drinking lots of beer."

And in that one statement, from a man wearing a red dress, i discovered the key to understanding New Orleanian culture. Sometimes, it's not necessary have a reason to enjoy things. Sometimes, celebration is allowed to be spontaneous and free and sometimes, there's no better place to find it than in the moments that really arent all that special.

Savings account woes

2009-06-02T06:33:00.000-07:00

A while back i saw that if i switched to an online savings account, i would get maybe 5x more interest than i was getting with the local branch...

Ever since september, i get a regular (every 3 months) update saying that they are lowering my interest rate yet again. And lately they're getting more frequent.

i cant complain too loudly, i know the economy's bad, so keeping the interest rate would be idiotic for them. It's just sad that i'm not surprised anymore when my interest rate gets lowered again.

Anyways, anyone know of a local bank in Rochester that will treat me well... i'm thinking it's time to put my money in with my community.

Windows 7

2009-05-19T08:10:00.001-07:00

Looks like i'm a huge freakin nerd because i'm posting on my blog from a widget on a virtualized copy of windows 7 off my xp machine at work. oh well, sometimes it's the simple pleasures in life, even if those simple pleasures make you feel like a complete sellout for kinda liking them and wondering if this will go on your new laptop (when you have money for it, and when this comes out) instead of going all open source like you've been planning for years.

what to do what to do...

oh well. it's kinda nice.

Latest cd of the week purchases

2009-01-25T10:36:00.000-08:00

i ended up buying up 2 cds to cover through the month. At first, i figured that would be the best way to go about things, especially if i end up ordering cds online, but now i'm thinking that it's too long of a wait for someone impatient like me. Plus, it will allow me to really soak in just the one album instead of multitasking like i'm so prone to do.

These weeks albums:
1) Modest Mouse - Good News for People who Love Bad News
i wasnt planning on buying it when i walked in but i love that Float On song and i just couldnt resist. My opinion of the cd is that it really wins with some songs and really loses with others. Float On and The View and Bukowski and The Ocean Breathes Salty are amazing cuts, but i dont think the rest of the album does it for me.

2) Mae - Singularity
i thought The Everglow was pure genius so i thought i'd give this one a try too. i dont like it as much as Everglow, but i'll allow some time for the album to soak in. i didnt hear as much of the creative and different drumming that i'm used to from the Mae drummer, but there were a few songs that reminded me why i would consider buying a Mae album. i think there's great writing on that cd.

i'm not sure what's up for the next purchase. i've been bouncing back and forth between whether or not i should plan or be spontaneous. Up til now its been a mixture of both.

The other day i listened to World Cafe and they played an Animal Collective song (that i'm not sure how i felt about) and then said that people are saying it's of Pet Sounds proportions. That's quite a claim so i have to admit that i'm super curious about that kind of hype. But i found this "My Girls" song on youtube and i think it's pretty impressive. It's grown on me, despite that i lack a fondness for more electronic-type music.

huh... maybe i'll give it a shot next time.

tics in my eyes

2009-01-17T14:00:00.000-08:00

The past three days i've had a tic in my eye (is that how i spell it?)

My left eyelid twitches and twitches and twitches. My mom says it's from stress. Funny... i dont do anything these days. But, well, i can understand how i might be stressed.

Is that how that happens? Stress?

Music is Joy

2009-01-13T09:12:00.000-08:00

For me, i'm realizing how much joy music brings to my life. After experiencing so much loss lately i've needed a good way to cope. i'm not sure how i feel about coping, but i will say that sometimes, i just cant deal anymore with my overthinking of things and music just seems to be the healthiest escape for me.

Lately i've loved listening to Stevie Wonder's Pastime Paradise. The production on that song is incredible. i dont know anything about production, but i noticed it on that cut. And that says something.

So this year i've decided will be a year of music and finding joy in it because it seems like that is one of the few constant sources of joy in my life and to carry out my year of music i've decided to buy an album a week. Expensive, but right now (even though it's a vanity) the thought of buying a little bit of peace seems like it could possibly pan out this time. To quote Tobias,

"No, it never does. I mean, these people somehow delude themselves into thinking it might, but...but it might work for us.

Well, it might just work this time for me.

So to start i bought Bob Dylan's Highway 61 Revisited and Miles Davis' Kind of Blue. Now whenever i hear the song Highway 61 Revisited i think of Joaquin (sp?) Phoenix in Walk the Line wandering crazily around his room blasting it. That's pretty much what i look like when i listen to music i really like.

As far as Kind of Blue goes, i'm not sure what i think. As a self-proclaimed Miles Davis fan i have to say i'm partial to his Gil Evans collaborations (such beautiful melodies and simply epic arrangement), but i know that Kind of Blue was an album that turned the jazz world topsy-turvy. Honestly, i just dont understand it. i figure it's kinda like reading On the Road. Today it seems plausible that someone would meander all over the place, but back then it was novel and special and that much crazier.

So what albums are next? i'm not sure. i've had a mental list for years, but limiting myself to two now that i've given myself permission to actually buy something feels like just a tease.

Right now i'm thinking about picking up some Wes Anderson film soundtracks. Or Pink Moon. Or some more Stevie Wonder. Or maybe some Led Zeppelin albums. Or perhaps that Mae cd i always wanted but never seemed to get around to picking up. Or maybe something that i've never even heard of before?

There's too much to keep track of these days.

Stay tuned for more album posts. It'll give me a good reason to blog consistently, even though the blog boat has blown by. In that case, maybe i'll just twitter everything so people will actually read all the way to the bottom.

Women

2008-11-29T16:06:00.000-08:00

And maybe men say they're glad not to give birth, all the pain and blood, but really that's just so much sour grapes. For sure, men can't do anything near as incredible. Upper body strength, abstract thought, phalluses - any advantages men appear to have are pretty token.
-from Choke by Chuck Palahniuk

Irony, Beer, and the death of humanity

2008-10-06T17:45:00.000-07:00

i'll be the first to admit that the title might be a little overdramatic, but according to a science podcast i've been listening to (and the zeitgeist of the times as well as the emergent church movement), i need to present a narrative that will sucessfully compete for your attention.

Either way, i've been spending quite a bit of time at home since i'm job searching. This requires me to be on the computer a whole lot because that's my main way of looking for openings and applying for them (especially since i'm looking in the technology field). While on the computer today (although not looking for a job) i was listening to a science podcast called Radio Lab where part of their show was spent describing how the internet is disconnecting people from each other while also presenting a pseudo connectedness. This is not a new idea, but it did strike me that in that moment i was embodying their description and also at the same time nodding my head in agreement and disdain for the stupid internet that tears all those generic people in the generic world away from having lives. Irony.

Apparently, these days the average amount of picnics that Americans go on per year has declined quite a bit since 1992 and they've even seen a decrease in the attendance of bars. So apparently there is not as much beer flowing at bars. Unless the bar attending population is making up the difference (hopefully not), there is probably less beer being consumed at these bars. Beer.

All this spells the death of humanity to me. It seems like it's harder for me to be human when i put myself in situations where i'm happily placated and also have all these opportunities to further stunt my growth as a person. Again over-dramatic, but kinda true!

That's why i appreciate what the Tribeca Arts project people did this summer. i wish i had heard about it earlier, but i really like the idea of re-humanizing people! How much fun would it be to find some sort of community art project that could start to do this? i think this is why i'm so drawn to postsecret and a huge reason New Orleans was such a strange and appealing place to me.

So raise your glass to re-humanization!

umm... WHAT?!

2008-09-24T12:38:00.000-07:00

Pay people to get their tubes tied huh?

i guess that's an idea one Lousiana representative is thinking through. Ok ok, i guess we should respect people who are actually giving solutions to problems that i must admit i have never bothered to even think through.

But this sounds plain funny. i'm sure he doesnt mean to wax eugenic, but that's the first thought that comes to mind!

There's got to be a better way to combat generational poverty!

To be fair, maybe this is just souped up sensational journalism...

Crazy in Love

2008-09-23T14:01:00.000-07:00

Well, in perusing (for some reason the spelling looks horrible to me) YouTube i found two great videos. Here's some fun things to check out...

Actually, if you ask me the best part of this video (besides Switchfoot covering this song) is the opening line from their guitarist.

And it's time for another Randy Newman song. Jane from New Orleans told me about this song. i think she really agreed with its sentiment. A word of warning, there's some bad language in this one (which now that you've seen that warning, you'll actually check the video out). And also, like my friend/acquaintance from Mexico said about The Royal Tenenbaums "If you don't think it's funny, you're probably just not smart enough to get it."

Bad Dog

2008-09-15T13:16:00.000-07:00

So i guess i have stepped into the realm of amateur photographer. Is that what i am? i have a bunch of cameras and enjoy taking pictures. Maybe that's an enthusiast? Anyways, who cares really. "What's in a name" right?

Moving on, a few months ago i was greeted with an email asking to use my photo for a business thing. Sounds fun. It was nice to know someone actually noticed what i did (someone that i dont know or someone that i dont strongly encourage to look at my pictures).

It's this picture of a sign that says "Bad Dog" that i found down my street somewhere. i thought it was a funny sign.

The woman who contacted me is starting a coffee shop and has her own coffee that she named "Bad Dog". So my picture is going on the coffee bags during the month of January 09 and since i took the picture, i get a bag of coffee per week.

i'm pretty excited about this. So excited even that i might try this coffee, even though i dont like coffee.

If you are interested in getting a bag of coffee let me know. If i feel like it, i may even send you one.

Stuff i've been into lately

2008-09-14T08:59:00.000-07:00

Well, apparently, stuff i've been into lately doesnt include posting to my blog.

Here's some fun videos i've loved (or been turned on to).

Randy Newman has been a favorite lately. From listening to the Toy Story stuff as a kid and thinking, "Wow, that's a really catchy song." Then i learned he has this incredibly sardonic side, or maybe he's a sarcastic, satiric songwriter with a soft side - shown in the movie soundtracks. And i love his voice. It's gritty and soulful to me. Cant ask for more...

My dad came up to me the other telling me about Tiny Tim. He was shocked to know i'd never heard of him. My goodness this guy is a piece of work! And i mean that in a nice, complementing way because i myself am quite a piece of work too. Although, when i read his bio on wikipedia, i discovered that he had an encyclopedic knowledge of early 1900's music (if i remember the period correctly).

Also, in the movies i've been watching recently i was thinking that when it comes down things in relationships, honesty is absolutely, incredibly important. i dont think there's room for deception and "feint within a feint within a feint" when it comes to healthy interactions with people.

Joyful scream

2008-04-22T20:23:00.001-07:00

Joyful scream
Originally uploaded by jugglingnutcase.

This could only happen in New Orleans. Earlier this week, i had dropped off my parents after spending time with them around town and as i was walking back to my parking spot i came across a street full of pirates. They were here for Pyrate Con 2008. So since i always carry a camera around with me i simply had to take pictures of these crazy people. It looked pretty fun. i saw everything from guys dressed like Jack Sparrow to women in crazy outfits and thought, "wow, this simply cannot happen anywhere but in New Orleans."

And apparently pirate is really spelled "Pyrate". At least that's what all the signs said.

weird

2008-03-12T08:54:00.001-07:00

someone was shot and killed a block away from where i live last night

Getting a haircut

2008-02-13T15:48:00.001-08:00

Today i got my haircut at a place called Juju Bag. It's a combination coffee shop/barbershop. Who knew, right? It's the first establishment of its kind that i've ever seen and the fact that it's by our house is just another surprise.

i walked in and sat down in the barber chair and the owner, Phyllis, started to grill me on what i'd like for a haircut. As she got to work, i asked questions about what has happened in her life, how she came to New Orleans, and other miscellaneous questions. By the time i was done, i noticed that an hour and ten minutes had passed!

An hour and ten minutes! i dont think i've ever had a haircut last that long. Dont get me wrong, i'm not complaining. In fact, i think it's funny and it's just as i would expect from a New Orleanian establishment. Living life here means slower, and talking, and interruptions, and taking it all in stride because it really doesnt matter if i get my haircut quickly.

Lesions to learn here everyday...

Tabernacle of Prayer

2008-02-11T22:04:00.001-08:00

tabernacle of prayer
Originally uploaded by jugglingnutcase.

This place is just down the street from me. The inside is full of trash.

i am convinced

2008-02-11T16:02:00.000-08:00

i'm pretty convinced that very few people in New Orleans understand the blinking yellow traffic light. i had about four cars try to stop for me when i had a stop. i appreciate the gesture, but i would have been nailed by the cars that were driving in the other lane!

My teammate Arthur also relayed to me that he owes an inordinate amount of money on his car because all of his brakes are shot even though his mechanic in Ohio checked them and said they were fine last August. This comes as somewhat of a surprise to me, but it seems reasonable. Louisiana roads are horrible. And i wont even go into the amount of litter that there is.

i'm struggling a lot with this place because i'm seeing a little bit of its true colors. It's a mess here. i'd expect a mess after Hurricane Katrina, but the kind of mess runs way deeper. i'm going to have to brush up on my history because this place has deep-seated problems. My struggle is that i see what is necessary here and i'm starting to understand the sense of mission an outsider like me must have to stay here and i'm also wondering if i even have it.

By the way, i have a bunch of unfinished posts that are in the works that i hope to finish eventually! That would be great wouldnt it? i think so. Check back soon and see if i ever got to work on them.

freakish things

2008-01-08T09:19:00.000-08:00

There are plenty of freakish things associated with me being back in New Orleans... here's a small glimpse.

Yesterday i was in Boston, which was freakishly warm. So warm in fact that the day before i was playing frisbee in the park in a tshirt. Turns out it wasnt as warm as i thought because the air is running at my house in New Orleans keeping the temperature in the house cooler than the temperature outside! It's almost 80 degrees and it's January. i'm really not used to this.

i've been a little dizzy. This is not normal for me. But it's only for a few minutes and it's been sporadic for a few days. i think it's because i'm on the verge of a cold or something like that.

Ken mentioned a great freakish thing. He said, "It's freakish when everyone's car stereos are louder on the outside than mine is on the inside." Yes i agree.

This isnt freakish, but i'm glad that LSU won and i'm also glad because i'm pretty sure the bowl game brought money into the city. i'm just hoping that it didnt go to the casino.

Welcome to Rochester!

2007-12-18T08:46:00.000-08:00

Last night i flew back to Rochester from New Orleans for Christmas. It's early to be traveling home for Christmas i know, but that's what happens when you work with the people that i do.

The plane ride in was beautiful. The snow covered the ground and the soft, warm yellow streetlights reflected off it. It was a sight to see, especially after spending the previous part of the week in shorts and a t-shirts.

While i was reveling in my love for snow and how strange it was to enjoy being somewhere cold (but i do actually like cold weather), i was rudely awakened by the captain of the plane giving his commentary:

Welcome to Rochester, where it's colder than my ex-wife's heart.

To each his own...

winter away

2007-12-08T07:41:00.000-08:00

i'm spending this winter farther away from home than i've ever been before. While i have (for the most part) lived away from home since college, i have never been more than an hour away.

It's not officially winter yet, but in Rochester over Thanksgiving it snowed and i think it's still cold there right now. Here in New Orleans, it's still warm. Yesterday i was walking around in shorts and a t-shirt. Last Sunday, i went to church in pants and a long sleeve shirt and was insanely hot because it was 80 degrees outside!

Incredible! For a snow loving, former cross country skiing, i love the winter and the cold kind of person, i'm still just waiting for the weather to turn, and it's not.

oh man i love this show

2007-11-23T10:30:00.001-08:00

"That's what Zippy's all about! It's a celebration of stupidity!" -Louis Stevens

"Bacon, it's nature's candy." -Twitty

Public vs Private Space

2007-11-22T20:33:00.000-08:00

While wandering around downtown New Orleans taking pictures of the city, Ken mentioned an article that he had recently read about an apartment building in NYC that has all glass walls. The apartments arent separated by anything more than glass! Even the walls within the apartments are glass, including the bathroom. Now, before you get too nervous, they do have curtains or something like that to allow for some privacty. Even so, wouldnt that make you nervous? My big complaint lately has been that living with the people i work with has created some messy "they know too much about my life issues" (i love living in community by the way, i just want to gripe a bit), so imagine if i had that complaint with every person that walked by my humble residence.

Voyeurism is a big theme these days with youtube, webcams, and facebook. In fact, as much as i think it's creepy and weird, i have to admit a love for facebook... make that an addiction to facebook. But dont worry, i never bother to look at your profile ;) Is reading my blog voyeuristic? (hmm... )

i could dig deeper into the idea of voyeurism, especially since that seems to clash with the "mind your own business" culture that i live with in New Orleans, but i'll leave you to think more on the subject yourself (even if you dont know the New Orleanian culture-or maybe it's inner city culture). Or perhaps i'll just leave the discussion to the architects,

i will say that lately in my media-junkie frenzy during this little vacation at home i've found that this isnt a new subject. Not new at all.

Yesterday i watched Alfred Hitchcock's Rear Window. That whole movie was based on voyeurism. i think i didnt really get the ending because i was a little confused about the evidence. Either way, although the ending was optomistic, watching the movie made me feel the same way that i feel when i spend too much time on facebook: trapped in a small space, listless, and bored.

During my latest media of fix, i found some incisive wit and commentary on the subject in the strangest of places: Even Stevens. That's right, Even Stevens had an episode where Ren has a slumber party and Louis sets up cameras all over the living room so that he can charge all the guys he knows $10 to watch.

Beauty and smarts in the strangest of places eh?

Here's that article i was talking about

Thanksgiving Surprise!

2007-11-20T20:12:00.000-08:00

Surprise!

What better way is there to spend Thanksgiving than to tell your family that you're not sure if you'll be able to make it home for the holiday and then to just show up?

Well, that's what i did. Except it turned out just a tad bit different.

i flew out of Dallas on Monday morning since we had a little staff conference in Tyler, Texas. That was my first time ever in Texas and i believe it also counted as the farthest west i've ever been in my life, unless you play some mindtricks and say that Texas counts as east and New York is actually west of Texas (but that doesnt really work does it?)

After a stop at Kennedy airport, i arrived in Buffalo and spent the time filling out a baggage claim so they would deliver my missing baggage to my home in Rochester. Then i made a trip out to Chili's with old friends. There's something to be said about getting together with people that you know and that know you. Spending time meeting people in New Orleans has been wonderful, but it's nice to lay aside the "getting to know each other for the first time" work and just pick up where you left off with people that you have a comfortable understanding with.

So now for the strange surprise. i showed up at my house a little after midnight. i wished it wasnt so late, but i figured that my family would be excited enough to see me that it wouldnt matter that i was waking them up at that hour. i rang the doorbell...

and nothing happened.

So i rang it again, and again, and again, and again. Five times total actually. No one woke up! Not mom or dad or Carole, or even the dog!

i ended up sneaking into the house (i know where we keep the keys), writing my family a note announcing my arrival, and going to bed.

My mom ended up waking me around 6:30 as she prepared for work. She opened my bedroom door which shed the hallway light all in my eyes and then got dad out of the kitchen asking if he knew that i was home. They both came into my room and were greeted with a groggy face and an incoherent Jamie.

So much for a dramatic surprise. i guess it turned out dramatic for my parents! but that's what counts isnt it.

It's good to be away from the city for a bit, i need a little break!

tires

2007-11-01T19:13:00.000-07:00

i'm convinced that every tire in the city of New Orleans is low.

Pictures of puppies!

2007-10-30T21:15:00.001-07:00

if you click on any of the photos, it will take you to my flickr account where you can see more puppy pictures, as soon as i put them up!

Puppies!

2007-10-27T19:47:00.000-07:00

Today while on the way to drywalling a house down the street a guy stopped us (Arthur, Rebecca, Danielle, and i) and asked us if we wanted any puppies.

In my mind i was thinking,

Oh yeah i want puppies! But i must be careful, otherwise i will be suckered into making bad decisions. i dont have the money or the time or the energy to raise one dog, much less 4 of them. Well, maybe i'll just take a look...

And then, after taking a look, of course we took them home with us and built them a pen and i carved out a little doggy bed out of a cardboard box filled with towels. They were so cute. The little guy i carried home was shaking the whole way. i think they were cold, they looked so scared. i tried to coddle the little guy to keep him warm and pet him so that he would know he was loved, but he still shook and shook and shook.

After listening to an episode of This American Life this weekend about an adopted Romanian child that grew up alone with no human contact except for when he was fed, and seeing a shaking, scared, cold puppy, i'm beginning to think that there's actually some truth to all that bonding talk.

Arthur, Danielle, and Rebecca took them to the SPCA, but i got a few pictures. i got them developed pretty much immediately afterwards so i'm hoping to put some up tomorrow so that you can see just how cute those things are.

In other news, i started construction on my very own bicycle today. For $25 dollars you can build a bike out of recycled parts at a warehouse shop called Plan B. i hope to have that finished soon. i can take all sorts of fun trips once i have a bike!

Adventures await!

Stories from New Orleans.

2007-09-16T11:31:00.001-07:00

Living and spending time in New Orleans has inevitably put my in contact with lots of different people and spending time in the Quarter means that you will have people come up to you asking for money.

i'm undergoing a personal war trying to decide how i feel about giving money to people who ask for it on the streets. In my heart there's a mixture of compassion and complete mistrust, so which do i listen to, and what is right in the situation? i'm still figuring that out. i think i'd rather give the benefit of the doubt and make a mistake than allow my heart to close up to people that need help, but the lines here are way more blurry to me than that.

Well, here's two stories i do have. Now that i think about it, they are very supportive of giving people money, but i'll tell them and let you think through them. This probably fits in with the idea that the bad stories are usually the most noticeable...

The first week i was here in New Orleans our team went out to dinner to get to know each other better. After a nice dinner of blackened catfish (i think my first time eating catfish), we stopped by an ice cream shop and sat outside enjoying it. While we were sitting in black chairs with twisty metalwork (that's an apt description of the chairs i think) around a small round table a man walked up to us and asked for change for something. Change isnt a big deal, i might've actually given him some change, but i didnt and neither did anyone on my team. So he asked us, "Do you even have change?" i'm assuming (which can be dangerous) that none of us had any change because some people answered his question and as Christians, we try not to lie. The guy ended up slapping a penny on our table and saying, "i feel bad for people without any change on them. In fact, i feel so sorry i'm going to give you a penny so that you can have change."

It took a few minutes for that to sink in, but after five or so minutes. i felt so violated. i didnt have change and by that point i'm glad i didnt have any to give him. After thinking so much about the concept of "boundaries" i think that man could not handle us not having change to give him, and probably couldnt accept a no from us either. He probably thought we were lying to him, i can see that side of the argument, but that was one of the meanest, scathing comments i've heard from someone. i still have the penny, it's sittiing on my mirror on my dresser. i think i'm going to hand out pennies to people when i feel guilted into something.

The second story is similar. When we were waiting around to go into Jackson Square for a candlelight vigil for the second year anniversary of Katrina a guy came up to the girls on a bike and handed them a flower. He obviously expected money and then he said, "five dollars to help the homeless get a hot dog?" Ok, i can see that. $5 sounds expensive for just a hot dog, but yeah, $5 for a meal sounds resonable. They gave him some money and it wasnt much. So he took the flower away from them and gave them a less impressive one, it was not red but white and looked fairly wilted.

That seems less mean to me, and more understandable than the other guy, but something still rubs me the wrong way with that and i havent figured out exactly what it is yet. It seems disingenuous (?) Is that the right word? It seems deceiving or devious or something like that.

Stories from New Orleans.

2007-09-16T11:31:00.000-07:00

maria full of grace

2007-09-04T20:53:00.001-07:00

maria full of grace
Originally uploaded by jugglingnutcase.

Here's my second attempt at some art. i'm still trying to figure out how to use those complicated photo editing programs.

And now for something completely different...

Today i got to meet some magicians (illusionists?) and we had dinner together. And of course, during dinner, Ken had to mention that i juggled. After sharing a little bit of my spiel, i closed with this great one-liner, "i just like to manipulate things."

That got all the grief you can imagine a statement like that getting. i eventually found myself quoting Star Wars, waving my hand around the table saying, "You will buy me dinner."

Sorry i havent been posting as regularly. There's plenty to post about, but i've been lazy. Though i will say that having a computer desk makes all the difference in the world. i was much less inclined to use the computer when it involved being hunched over on my floor.

Til the next one, soak it in and see what you think.

Brad Pitt makes a crazy claim!

2007-08-22T13:28:00.000-07:00

Brad Pitt, in an article on the New Orleans Times-Picayune, claimed that in New Orleans he and Angelina,

can almost live a normal life here

Wow. What does this say about the city if super-star celebrities like them can almost find normalcy here?

Grocery Shopping in New Orleans

2007-08-19T09:50:00.000-07:00

And now for the other shoe. Watch out! It's dropping!

After my last post of how New Orleans is such a wonderful city, i didnt want you to experience what i read in a dating book a little while ago...

"You're the most wonderful person I've ever met!"
"After only knowing her for two days, that was the scariest thing she could have ever said. I did not want to be apart of her fantasy world and I could not possibly run away fast enough!" (loosely quoted from a Henry Cloud book)

New Orleans is not perfect either. This is evidenced by the ridiculous amounts of money i spent on groceries yesterday. Granted, i'm new here and am buying up basics that i wont need to buy a month down the road, but $2.89 for a half gallon of milk seems crazy. Is it going up that high in Rochester too?

i'm missing Wegmans, fo sho.

Red Dress Run

2007-08-18T17:57:00.000-07:00

As it turns out, life in New Orleans is a little bit different. From strange house colors (hopefully i'll have good film pictures from my neighborhood walk later in the year) to strange culture-mixing to strange people to strange events, this place is full of fun people and places. Any excuse to party is good enough.

Some of my teammates wonder what's going on.

This mentality is evidenced in these few photos from my relief team's tour of New Orleans. We didnt even know that anything was going on in the town, but we drove right through the red dress run. That's right. The red dress run, where everyone was dressed in red, most of them in red dresses (men and women alike).
We talked to a few people and asked them what was going on. They're response (my paraphrase)?
"Running around in red dresses, drinking beer, partying in the absurd heat of August, basically any excuse to party."

What a fun place!

Holism?!

2007-08-15T12:54:00.000-07:00

i'm thinking about doing a blog series on concepts. Concepts i like.

Like holism, and "there is no isolated event", and redemption, and so many other concepts.

i think they're just grandiose plans, but i hope i follow through. i have yet to follow through on my intense analysis of David Crowder's A Beautiful Collision album (because it's genius).

So we'll see if i follow through.

On another note, i'm currently in Pensacola Florida for work. For work! Can you believe that? We're planning out the rest of our "relief" work over the course of the year between beach trips and reading the first Harry Potter book. That's right, i've finally started reading the first Harry Potter book.

i'm also hoping to make this more of a photo blog, so i'll try to include a picture for every post. But i dont have my camera cord here, so you're just gonna get this weird photo i took on my teammate Danielle's sweet macbook.

Slacking in New Orleans

2007-08-12T20:40:00.000-07:00

Since i've just recently moved to New Orleans, i've just been soaking things in and relying on my team. And today i was thrilled when all my buddies down here wanted me to set up my slackline.

That's right, they wanted. Usually it's me trying to convince other people that it really is cool, but not this time!

We also had Lake Pontchartrain as a backdrop, and a stunning backdrop it is.

By the way. Even though i'm extremely white, i ate at this place yesterday:

i've gained an hour on the entire world!

2007-08-10T15:00:00.000-07:00

Ever since i was a child, i've loved the concept of playing with time. While, now i've actually succeeded. This past Tuesday, i gained an hour of time. And i will not have to give it back!

How did i do this you ask? Simple. i moved down to New Orleans.

The picture is of the house i'm sharing with four other people.

Isnt that fun? i'm in New Orleans. i'll be doing relief work here for the next bunch of months (til next may) with Campus Crusade for Christ. i've already walked around my neighborhood taking pictures already and it is a fun place to live. The houses here are all these eccentric colors. From magenta to bright yellow, to robin's egg blue.

i've met up with my team and they're decent folk. The kind of people you can see yourself enjoying and getting angry at and picking on and laughing with. Ah, that's sweet, isnt it?

The trip was a blast too, especially since i've never driven my car south of the New York border (i dont get out much). i drove over the course of three days from Rochester to New Orleans, spending a night in Ohio and Tennessee visiting friends.

Here's to a new life in a new city! Let the fun begin!

Latest book read: For Women Only...

2007-07-13T16:18:00.000-07:00

Since i got back from Maine i've been enjoying the use of my public library (Seriously, i have a strange affinity for libraries) and have loved every minute of it.

So i picked up a few books. One of which was titled, For Women Only. Now before you get any funny ideas, let me explain that this book purports to let you in on "The secret inner lives of men" In order to learn about my secret inner life i decided to give it a shot. Guess what i found?

i have a secret inner life! And women dont know it!

Talk about empowering, or maybe unfortunate? No, i think exciting.

i learned from reading this that my need for affirmation to the nines is actually common and not a james specific thing. Apparently men everywhere need affirmation, are scared other people will find out they have no idea how to do whatever it is they're trying to succeed at, and like to be lost on the highway.

i loved the section on getting lost while driving. i was cheering on the author while reading. "Yeah! We see it as another challenge to conquer! (male noises followed) And i like being lost too and it's ok."

Man, i'm gonna start reading more women's books.

my new vocabulary

2007-07-08T13:05:00.001-07:00

playing at the top of Thunder Hole
Originally uploaded by jugglingnutcase.

As a few of you know, i was recently in Maine. It was amazing. That picture is our group hanging out on pink granite, right by the ocean. i spent so much time rock climbing, biking, hiking, and backpacking and discovered that yes, nature is pretty sweet.

i've changed a whole lot since i left for Maine over a month ago, but one of the funniest changes is my vocabulary.

If i ever talk to you about "bonding issues", what do you suppose i'm talking about? Talk about an iceberg! That phrase is loaded with ideas and concepts in my mind but what do you suppose that means?

Or "boundaries"? Or "Good and Bad" or "Judgment and Acceptance" or "should vs. could" or "choices and consequences" or "one-up/one-down"

"how might you...?"

i feel like a little underdeveloped Henry Cloud baby, a little baby body waddling around with a big james head spouting Henry Cloudisms - "Take responsibility for your feelings!"

well... do it.

i hope my family turns out like this

2007-05-13T19:52:00.000-07:00

When (if?), no when (please!), i have a family, i hope it looks somewhat similar to mine. At least in this respect:

Tonight after hearing my sister comment on my dad's "bird legs" i described cankles to my parents. They had never heard of them. They got a kick out of cankles. It is fun to say, i must admit.

Dad wondered aloud about other malformations and came up with...

bunkles.

Just let that soak into your mind and hopefully a good mental picture comes out the "other end"...

(haha, i love our weird humor)

Embodiment?

2007-04-27T07:04:00.001-07:00

Can we all agree that bacon is amazing? Before i go on with my post, i just want to clear that up because it will come back later...

i dont really embody myself well. Recently, i finished this book called Real Sex by Lauren Winner on a very unpopular subject popularly known as chastity. Tossing chastity aside for this post, (scandalous ;) i'd like to talk about a specific point in her book. Theo-speak follows: Winner talks about how the body is a created thing just like the spirit is a created thing and how they are both to be redeemed in the future.

The way i took that is that the body is important too. Therefore the idea that we are to spiritually evolve out of our bodies is unbalanced. Now if i walked up to somebody on the street and asked them, "are you trying to evolve to the point where you dont need a body anymore?" they would probably look at me very strangely. But growing up in the Christian worldview, this is how i have acted. i have acted in a way that makes me think that God thinks my body is ugly or not useful. And it might not be too far for me to think other people act this way too.

All that to say: i dont embody myself well. Especially lately. Last week i think i ate out for half of my meals that week. i havent run or exercised in forever. And the other morning i woke up and decided that i would like to finish all that bacon i had left over from my individual tribute to the month of April (National Grilled Cheese Month), and then i followed that meal the next week with my friends as we celebrated by eating about 3-4 grilled cheese sandwiches each and washed it down with 2 cans of Dr. Pepper. i've kept really strange hours, sleeping in, waking up early, i stayed up until 3 AM last night for the first time in who knows how long.

And my body is pissed! Let me tell you. i think i'm reaping emotional consequences as a result of screwing with my health! Two days ago i was alternatingly irritable and depressed.

Another thing. This could be a whole post on its own, but i have no idea how to use my body outside of sports, and its a very small list of sports. i can play frisbee, run, and... well, maybe that's it. Do video games count?

i cant dance. One friend of mine, after watching me butcher a line dance said, "James, you move like a stick" in the sweetest tone of voice ever. i wasnt mad because i knew of the truth of the statement. My dance style is characterized by an inability to dance and it makes for good entertainment and fun for everybody. i think that's great, dancing is for fun and i have fun.

So there's a theological way to say, "man i've been super lazy and super negligent." Good thing i get to spend the month of June working out and enjoying the outdoors in Maine at Acadia!

Sweet... Acadia.

Lest you think this is a "woe is me" post, well, dont think that. i'm disappointed in myself, but thinking about how horribly i ate last week is astoundingly funny and i see nothing but room for improvement (especially with my dance moves).

pass the bacon.

Mean People

2007-04-08T18:29:00.001-07:00

i've absolutely loved listening to This American Life. The topics are fun, the speakers eloquent, and there's nothing more invigorating than digging into how people think.

Currently i'm thinking through an episode on how mean people have this allure, the kind that draw you in despite the distaste you claim to have for them.

Reminds me of my psychology class. We spent one day discussing rewards and in general rewards that were given unpredictably and sporadically seemed to be more successful in producing the desired behavior. The reason as i understood it was that the subject would work harder to figure out the rhyme and reason behind the reward, even though there may not really be one.

Reminds me of Arrested Development (just like everything these days). Michael is always seeking out his father's approval. Even though Michael is intellectually aware that his father is manipulative and prone to pitting his family against each other, he continues to give his father good ideas, which his father shoots down to keep Michael working for him. It's horrible to watch but makes for good comedy. Try to dissect that last statement!

i have a story of my own. Indefinitely in my past, i nursed an awful crush towards this girl. i was convinced she was the most beautiful person in the world, and still think she's absolutely gorgeous. One problem though, she seems to have no respect for me. In fact, i remember coming home from hanging out with her and feeling absolutely horrible about myself after taking what felt like an insurmountable offense of cutting remarks. Now i'm overly sensitive about these things, but looking back, i'm pretty convinced that i wasnt too far off in my assessment of the situation.

Funny how that works. For another indefinite amount of time i continued in the crush, feeling walked over a good chunk of the time, with just enough laughs to constitute sporadic and unpredictable rewards.

So what is it?

i once heard, i forgot who said it that:

we're running around doing things we hate to please people we dont even like.

What's the draw? What makes us seek this approval?

Grand Experiment

2007-04-07T07:03:00.000-07:00

Actually, it's not so grand.

But ever since my junior year when i took psychology the way people think and interact has just caught my interest.

So today i think i'm going to play with some ideas. Nothing special, just do little things to see how people react.

If you wanted a glimpse into your friends thoughts, what do you think you would do to draw their thoughts out?

Maybe take a risk and see how they respond?
Maybe give them a kiss?
Maybe eat their lunch?
Maybe ask them a questions that might be just a bit past the line which your relationship dictates?

(i'm not planning on just randomly giving someone a kiss, so if you read this, dont worry about that one. All the others might be fair game though, i dont know yet)

It's a little strange i admit, but in the words of Bobcat Goldthwait:

Ya gotta make your own fun, Space Ghost, ya gotta make your own fun!

Brave little Buzzy finds his way home

2007-03-27T20:52:00.000-07:00

A Movement in Five Parts:
I. The Fading Red Light

Buzzy was scared. He didnt know where he was, but it was really dark. So dark in fact, when his neon red light flickered, it barely illuminated his surroundings. "This doesnt feel at all like my home!" he exclaimed, "I'm supposed to be carried around lovingly and returned when delicious food is ready for my friends!"
Little did Buzzy know the adventure he would embark on!

II. The loving hands of a friend

Fortunately for Buzzy. Good friends do really exist. "Oh wow little guy! You must be so scared. Dont worry. i love you!" The voice of his savior was soothing like a golden brook weaving through green forests and over blue stones. James rescued Buzzy from the evil purse of the three witchy Americans working in Toronto. "i'll bring you home Buzzy! i love you!" James adamantly asserted.

III. Buzzy's sweet ride

Buzzy got excited. And understandably so! He was riding shotgun in the manliest vehicle ever. "Wow, the tires on this thing are bad! i love you Squiggles!" The car's name was Squiggles. And man, was that car ever manly! Just to be safe, James buckled Buzzy right in. Even though Buzzy was snug and secure. He was shouting and screaming the whole ride.

IV. Home quickly approaches

Despite his obvious excitement, Buzzy could barely muster the strength to blink his red light for joy. Fortunately he was close; close to the home he was raised in. Soon he would be back in his charger, smelling the freshly baked buns and rolls, eavesdropping in on the crunch of chopped celery and can openers releasing the pungent smell of tuna from brightly polished aluminum.

V. Buzzy is reunited with his home

"Thanks so much" said Buzzy's mom as she took him from James and wrapped him in her loving arms. Though the interaction was awkward, and she was obviously caught off guard by James documentation of Buzzy's greatest moment, her uneasiness paled in comparison to having the little buzzer that lets people know their food is ready. Our friend Buzzy. Now he can rejoin his home and life, making people really happy because they can now eat. Ah, it's really about the simple pleasures isnt it?
Wow that was weird...

the web

2007-03-24T09:27:00.000-07:00

After checking my email and being absolutely beside myself because i sold another textbook on half.com (even though this one is halfway decent), i was surprised by this headline:

Many Americans See Little Point To Web: Survey

Wow.

These people exist?

i guess i'm such a webphile i wouldnt dream of not having an internet connection. You should have seen me balk at the suggestion last September that i share a DSL connection. Yeah. Right. Not a chance.

Really, it's all about the bandwidth baby.

Hey girls! At home i can download the new ubuntu really fast! You should come over and see it sometime!

Katrina stories

2007-03-22T11:37:00.000-07:00

It occurred to me yesterday that most people havent joined me on the trip i took last week. It sounds obvious, and it is, but i tend to keep information locked away figuring it doesnt need to be shared because we'll just rehash old news again and again.

But it isnt the case this time. There was a whole world of experiences to share, fortunately for anyone reading i will only relay a few that i know.

My favorite story is one that a work team leader told after the first day of working in the houses, but let me describe the week's setup a little bit first.

i joined about 1000 people (mostly college students) involved in Campus Crusade for Christ down in New Orleans Louisiana to help rebuild the city. The whole lot of us were split up into work teams of 10-15 people each and split up all over the city to gut out houses and elementary schools, clean up city parks, survey neighborhoods to see if anyone is living there or needs work done, and talk to the residents there to see how they are dealing with the crisis.

After the first day of work, all the work team leaders joined together to talk and get the next set of instructions and the trip leaders asked if there were any stories. One girl stands up and says,

Well, i'm pretty sure i have a story.

As soon as her group arrived to their ungutted house, the homeowner mentioned that if they found a blue beanbag chair they shouldnt open it. If that doesnt automatically raise hairs on your neck, well, then, i'm not sure. They took it in stride and got back to work. Soon they found a handgun. Strike one. They called in the handgun and continued working and the homeowner didnt seem to pleased with them about it. Not too much later they found a bag that appeared to be drugs. i'm unclear on this part of the story, but i'm assuming they "forgot" to mention this to the owner. Strike two.

They continued working (i'm pretty sure i would've left by this point) and kicked out the walls and were now ready to work on the ceiling. And lo and behold, there was the blue beanbag chair. So instead of heeding the homeowners advice, whether wise or not, they distracted him by starting a conversation with him in the front yard while sneaking the beanbag out the back. They opened up the beanbag and found a big rifle. And you know what? Strike three. They called the police and booked it out of there.

Good idea i think.

i was in stitches from this, mostly because if no one got hurt, this is hilarious. My friend said,

Well, drug dealers need somewhere to live too.

Not sure if they were dealing, but that wasnt the best situation to be in!

i hope to continue sharing stories. If you want to have some fun, check out my pictures online linked in the post below!

NOLA pictures

2007-03-19T13:20:00.000-07:00

Hey, here's a bunch of photos for you to check out! They're from my trip to New Orleans. Wow, there's so much to write about. i'll have to give it some time to allow everything that happened to settle in a bit!

So expect a post soon!

For now, please check out the third section of photos i took from my time there. i'll post the first two sections when i get them back from my friend Josh!

Katrina Part III - Picasa

or if you prefer Flickr

Katrina Part III - Flickr

stolen from my facebook "about me" section

2007-02-19T09:09:00.001-08:00

i obsess over music, am overly self-conscious, easily embarrassed, honest in the wrong places (like facebook about me paragraphs), fiercely loyal (to the good and the bad), explore libraries for fun, think cross country skiing is cool - i have an undying respect for bjorn daehlie, sometimes i wish i was an academic, sometimes i wish i was a farmer, my dad and i think living on the moon is a cool idea, i dont really know i guess, but i'm learning.

Cell Phones and Responsibility

2007-02-14T18:02:00.000-08:00

Last weekend i was spending time in Vermont with a bunch of staff people that i work with. It was sweet! i went downhill skiing for the first time in my life, attempting a few black diamonds and even a few unforgiving snowdrifts. It was a real riot.

But i didnt have cell phone reception...

So i received a message from a certain dear friend who will go unmentioned because i still like him. And he said, "I'm disappointed that your phone went straight to voicemail."

So i'm here to complain. Complain about the added responsibility having a cell phone gave me. Now that i have a phone that i can take with me anywhere, i am now required to be immediately reachable by everyone. Even when i'm in a faraway land with no cell phone reception, even though i may not have wanted to keep my phone on in the wilderness, i still answer to the unspoken requirement of being at everyone's fingertips!

Boo on that. i dont have to live up to you, you vicious piece of communicative equipment. You are the tool for my purposes, not the other way around!

Weird things in Genesis!

2007-01-30T19:26:00.000-08:00

i was reading through Genesis the other day and i discovered something very strange.

Well, at least i thought it was strange, you'll have to let me know what you think...

There's a story where Abraham gets visited by 3 ghosts, well actually, he just has three visitors. The passage says that the LORD appears to Abraham (singular) and then Abraham asks the three visitors (plural) not to leave but to eat with him. Nothing too out of the ordinary with that, besides the whole LORD part of it. Then while eating the visitors say that Abraham, even though he is around 100 years old, will have a child.

None of these strange things drew my attention because i'm used to hearing the story. When i think about it i notice how strange these occurances are. But the thing that threw me for a loop is what Abraham feeds them.

He feeds them "curds and milk and the calf that had been prepared." Isnt that strange? i'm pretty sure there's laws against that in certain sects of Judaism. i'm not certain if they're actual laws or what the semantics are, but i thought that dairy products and meat products werent supposed to be eaten together. And here we have Abraham (the father of the Jews) and the LORD himself enjoying dairy and a calf.

Strange strange... if anyone has any insights on this i'd be curious to know!

Such an appropriate website for me

2007-01-16T19:15:00.000-08:00

check out this website:

i like it. Too bad i dont take it to heart.

beryl.com

i'm also a big fan lately of this funny podcast run by two guys down south.

Rhett and Link (check out the blog part)

Have fun folks!

New Blog

2007-01-01T10:07:00.000-08:00

Well, i must admit, committed relationships are difficult for me.

i've switched blogging a million times, havent been consistent and all that... i mean really, i've blogged on livejournal (the most consistent one so far), facebook, my own site hosted through dotgeek, and myspace.

This better not be a prediction of future "relationships, and i dont mean just with girls" - relient k.

So because i'm an avid fan of google taking over the world, i think i'm going to continue the trend of signing up for every service they offer. Hopefully this will be enough to marry me to a blog and be the start of a beautiful committed relationship.

Which would be a fun thing to post about later: marriage.

ah marriage... There's nothing quite like talking definitively about something completely outside of your experience.